tuesday.

and so.
tuition ytd was okay.
learn new stuffs.
do work.

today.
wondering wad to do.
must finish the last bit of work.
den.
sch reopen.
den.
same old stuffs.

tried to polish my boots.
i left it alone ever since annaul camp ended.
webs and fungi grow on it.
so must repair.

nt much about life.
cuz.
nth interesting or something nice have happen.
so life actually quite sian.

new year's arrving.
must work harder.
make sure i go trip or combined science.
den.
nxt yr enter combo team again.
must get rank.
double the effort.
double the enthu.
double the will.
double the spirit.

monday.

yeah!
hw going to be finished!
left the 5 cards for lit!

today's a gd day.
ltr in the evening got tuition.
lol.
and so.
gonna say my end of yr acknowledgement.

~thanks a kindred~

would like to say thank you most to Zhonghua NCC and 1E3'08, for acompanying me across this yr. thank you to Mr Ng, CO ZHNCC, for giving me a chance to go to the energy conservation course, so I learnt that comnputersw dun waste much electrcity actually.

A great thank you to all my teachers, and those classmates that helped me academically. also a great thank you to those friends in e4 and e6, ryan and enzio.

A great thank you to ZHNCC cadets, especially ervin and helmi and koh chin, my best buddies. and also martin, weijie and soif, for teaching me much about NCC. and a great thank you to all specialists, especially my OIC SSG M H TAN and CSM SSG J C ZHENG, and also mentor S1 SSG J M LAM. also thanks to specialists lyk mitchell, chawn, chu xiong.

Thanks xavier for chatting to me during tuiton calss. keep the hard work GREAT ARTIST.

Thanks costner and frens, for the badminton sessions. also thanks to darren.

Thanks to huixia, for chatting to me on MSN when im bored.

Thanks to net force games for the CS sessions.

Last but not least, thanks to USM SSG Y J THUNG, my bro, for teahcing me much bout drills, NCC, jogging, army systems, a lot of stuffs. also thanks to his gf for the baked rice.

that's all.

saturday.

okays.
today is much more boring.
just lyk woke up in the morning.
den play com.
den bathe and eat lunch.

after that.
go jog with darren to pasir ris park.
go there jog a bit.
den walk walk thr.
he keep looking and tlaking bout gals.
frick u flirter!
and den.
got this pretty looking thing was roller blading.
unstable unstable.
i kept saying "fall down", and darren say i was evil.
but how would i noe she would fall down?
but she really did.

den.
wlk to darren hse.
long dist.
and den sit thr for a while.
b4 going to play poker with costner.
den.
when was a bout to go home.
saw zhiqaun. lol.
wanted to disiao him one.

~~~

well.
rmb just now cost and darren ask me the same qn.
cost ask when his gf arrive.
"u jealosu of us having gf?"

lol.
though a bit of childish.
but wanna share wif u guys.
to me.
i dun lyk romance.
and dun concerntrate much on it.
cuz i feel there's much more things i must care for.
lyk my future, career, cca...

maybe one day when a gal tell me "will u accpet me".
i would just say "i wanna concerntrate on other stuff".
but then.
i dun think this will happen ever.
maybe until twenty yrs ltr.

friday.

Thinking Back, Thinking Forward

Standing by the window,
Looking at the scenery.
Thinking back to months ago,
Mixed up memories.

Winter is passing by,
Spring is arrving.
Memories going by,
Sweet, sour, bitter.

Those cold and harsh mornings,
Childish and stubborn mates.
Am I really that bad,
For them to treat me this way?

A pump, we did together,
One step, we march off.
To give my best and utmost,
To the wonderful and meaningful Corps.

Many incidents happened,
Many people I met.
Many that had touched me,
Much that had joke me.

A year's passing by,
Sweet and sour.
But at least I'm glad,
I am still not fallen.

Spring's arrving,
Winter's ending.
Off with my civilian clothes,
Replaced with green armour.

Once again,
The same old days,
Coming back again.
Sweet and Sour, much more Bitter,
I just want it layed.

Dusty shoes,
Crumpled uniforms,
More good days to come?
A unwanted class,
A sworn brotherhood,
Life, conituing that way.


This poem, simply just tells about my life this yr and my hopes for nxt yr.

christmas eve.

even christmas eve is so sian.
nth much to do.
ltr might go celebrate.
lol.

somehow nowdays i look forward to tuition.
maybe bcuz the tcher teach real well?
and im waiting for mondays.

nth much to say today.
so.
sayonara.

tuesday.

just went out to buy some new clothes.
or else no clothes wear liao.
lol.
made a hole in my pocket.

and so.
besides shopping and com.
there's no more activities for the day.

tuition ytd was just as same.
same old tuitor, and i noe him well.
den a few new faces, but manage to have xavier beside me.
oh yah.
one very fking incident ytd.
christine fu came to my tuition class. WTF!?
she made dozens of tchers burst their veins in her pri sch days.
everyone hate her.
lol.
even shan is also dumbfolded by her arrival.
keep talking about the old enimity to the whole class.
make mr chan laugh lyk hell.

anyway.
but at least i noe how she feels that time.
when everyone hate u.
e3 gave me the fking feeling.
fking enough then.
maybe heaven wants me to payback by making her coming to my class?
lol.

anyway.
days to sch reopen are cming soon.
wonder have training on that friday or nt.

monday.

sianz.
today is also sian.
morning air con repairmen come.
evening nid go tuition.
sianz.

den tmr.
haven call ppl yet.
just wan to go out and happy.
lol.

not much about today.
cuz really nth to do at hm.

Self Potrait
Huang Chao

I will remember the days that I command army, fighting everywhere,

Heroic as I ran flying upside the straws.

Now I take off armored uniform to wear monk‘s clothes,

Standing on a bridge in Tianjin, none passer-by know who I am,

Turning back and depending on the bridge, watching the wonderful sunset alone.

sunday.

well.
another boring day of life.
wad makes the difference is that today's the end of winter season.
the arrival of spring in about two or three more weeks.
drunken spring breeze.

life revolves around cs, hw, play all day.
but there's tuition tmr.
start tmr, lol.

my life's as bored as shit.
i stay home all day to enjoy, and not have been toning my body for long.
soon they will send me to FAC. lol.
life for me is much more duller and blander than other ppl at my age.
maybe its my tradition.

lsch gonna open soon.
i wonder wad's in for me.
might be same old classmates, ncc pumpings, so on.

maybe because life is so bland.
i dunno how can i continue this post from here.
maybe tuesday can go play cs again.
lol.

yeah.

and so.
my day today was quite a nice one.
actually in the morning think whether should go sim lim or east coast.
then my mother say transport to east coast damn hard.
so did my dad.
anw, spending time wif brothers might be gd.
so is et off for kovan.

so i reach there.
walk about.
saw benjamin(camp feast guy) from yuying.
den go old chang kee buy sotong eat.
lol.

ltr.
ervin arrive.
we set off for little india.
lol.
den walk around there, go teka mall, figuring whr is sim lim.
nt long ltr bran arrives wif his bro.
look very alike.
we went to sim lim.
look for hardware.
memory card.
but the climax is whr bran and his bro stared at the sex shop.
lol. one of a kind?

den.
when me and ervin decides to go back to kovan.
its already 3-4.
i ask him whether go east coast then reach b4 5 can.
he say no.
i dun think so.
den he went into a lan shop.
me too, the usual one.
the usual stuff of fighting bots, marksman shots, headshots.
try using pistol and have many marksman shots.
think maybe can be junli the second.
lol.

den.
we bade gdbye and went home.
on the journey back.
somehow i feel its bad to nt turn up for class bbq when im force to go.
but.
building relationship in e3.
might not be as important than building wif my mates.

i owe favours to brandon.
i spent happy hours with my mates and bros.
happy movies, happy cs, happy dining.
sadistic pumpings, wayne's pt, continous drilling.
drilling, which the specs thinks is the way to build precision.
but then.
for me.
the chemistry is build when we spent time together, merge as one.

when the class ask for "one for all, all for one".
but wad is achieve?
when things becomes superficial, harsh and cold.
and sympathy.
but between platoon batch '08.
no hidden secrets, no agedas, no more fighting.
(sorry chong kai, i told ur secret to joel. lolz)

maybe much more precision is needed frm me to the platoon.
when we pump as one, run as one.
till the day we govern ncc as one, and pass out marching as one.

thursday.

"Baris Sedia!"

its been a long time i have never heard this command.
last time i would use to hear it many times on fridays.
the command's literal translation means attention parade.
the first move towards ultimate precision.
hope to listen to it real soon.

anyway.
yesterday night had conference with those ppl again.
but manfred join in.
lol.
talking a bout many topics.
but wad interest me most is the topic of part a btwn me and helmi.
we talk bout the deserving of ranks, the next to rise, so on.
and even talk bout part b chalet '09.
lol.

regarding ytd conference.
i have a few words delicated to my mates:

1) Chong Kai

u can change the way u communiciate between ur mates and frens. this is so as ur way of communiciation arouse attention of many people, and u just simply thinks that u're the centre of attention.

Literal Meaning:

Change ur ******* attitude. ur platoon mates cant stand it liao. then u sometimes think is their fault. Lol.

2) Kenny Chang

u're a kind hearted young man, but u lacks effort when u have high aspirations. also u must be able to understand ur frens when they gave u and invitation. u have to share much more things with ur mates.

Literal Meaning:

U're too kind to be a good militarian. maybe those strings got u all the stuff u wan, even protection. dun be so kiam pah to agree ur fren to go out then nvr appear. still tell me will reply me WTF?

3) Joel Tan

this young man has put effort in reforming himself for the acceptance of his peers. we agree to your reformation. but u still needs to fufil ur verbal promises.

Literal Meaning:

Bro, i can see changes in u, even helmi praises u a lot. however, nxt time dun lie to ervin. he nvr play paintball today he quite sian. nxt time make sure u do ho sae everything then tell us go happy. keep up with the gd timing.

4) Helmi

one of the best mate i have ever met from the pioneer nine. full of potential, u need to work harder and stop going to chong's afternoon gathering. i understand that there are no misunderstanding between u and chong kai. let's work hard together, bro.

Literal Meaning: None for real good friends.

5) Ervin

-The best mate ever after. More CS to come next time.-

7) Koh Chin

-One of the best mate ever after. More invitations to come.-

wednesday.

wednesday.

the day begin.
with nasi lemak for breakfast.
ervin came over at about 10.
then went to ride.

after lunch and some coffee.
we went off to kovan.
go buy ervin memory card.
sadly the stocks haven arrived yet.
the guy say will arrive today.
because of this.
ervin today dee siao the guy three times.
lol.

back to the story.
we ltr went to net force games with leonard.
den play cs condition zero.
play with bot.
lol.
afterwards we went back to kovan to walk.
den went arcade.
and den.
went home and rest.

~~~

well.
maybe can call up joel whether can play paintball tmr.
lol.
den might have conference with helmi.
and den.
work almost done.
and fri is class bbq.
seriously dun wan go derhs.
rather play cs become jun li the second(NCC national marksman).
but see the list pathetic.
no choice.
then have to make so much things.
to go there.
go there also no fren.
lol.
rather play lan whole day.

btw.
ask bran to burn GTA !V for me.
actually wan go buy or try borrowing from dongyi.
but now trust bran better.

haiz.
maybe gonna spent some boring time at east coast on fri.

simple, simple. days passed, its time to come to and end. for a new start.

sianz.

tuesday.

another sian day at home.
but done my lit work today.
one day done it.
whoa.
gt training de horhs.

anw.
today kelly call me go class bbq on fri.
actuall wan go out wif bran or ck on fri one.
den bo pian kelly beg me lyk hell.
aiya.
i see the name list wan die liao.
so less ppl go.
haiz.
rather go play cs or go other place.

den.
tmr ervin cming over for stunts and lunch.
and ltr will meet up with leonard and joel at net force games.
maybe thurs will go out wif joel again.
lolz.

anw.
just thinking of calling kenneth.
typical socialist, civil, zai nan.
wan call him go mcdonalds' outing or class chalet.
but dun think he will go.
everytime he excuses.
"he's a snake. of a kind."

anw.
before i go and die in TW.
here's some advice:

you will not reap what you sow, just because the world's unfair. if you do, count yourself lucky.

monday evening

life seems dead.
ltr maybe do some work.
TW very soon tio noble liao.
yeah.
what comes around goes around.
bringing nothing to life and nothing to death.
lol.

so.
not much to say.
just hope that life can be better.
somehow.

monday.

life these few days were still as simple.
sit in front of the com.
and also doing some work.
the war at TW makes me frustrated.
personal allies urged me daily to build noblemen.
sadly,
the farm needs upgrade.
no use of having a huge army without a nobleman.

then.
a few days ago.
having kenny's TW acc sat.
oh gosh.
his resources plants are so huge.
but yet.
his wall is weak.
so does his troops.
pure socialist.
i dun think he will be a good militarian, looking at his TW.
then.
when he have another acc sitter, he nvr notice me.
that's make him even worse to be a militarian.

okays.
and so.
just wanna finish up the work this few days.
and then can go out with frens.
these few days has been waiting for conference.
then wednesday ervin will come over to my hse.
who ever else wanna happy with us call me.

as i thought of those frens.
from pri sch, e3, ncc...so on.
thinking of those now who has gain power, authority, romance.
maybe i should tell them.
its not everlasting?

what comes around goes around.

saturday.

another bored day.
excpet for some relatives cming over to my hse.
den my bro said he left his keys inside armory.
maybe borrow rifles from ZHSS.
lol.

den.
not much to say today.
just for ZHNC ppl.
if u guys are free on wed, contact me.

before i go,
here's some words:

some things are meant to stay history,
some things are meant to stay literature,
some things are meant to reived.

some things are meant to stay,
some things are meant to pass,
some things are meant to happen.

logic is meant to stay, reviewed like history,
tales are meant to pass, written in literature,
legend is meant to happen, revived again.

a very sian friday nite.

a very sian friday nite.
sian sian sian.

and so.
have been acc sitting for a TW person.
ppl keep owning him.
big trouble.
watse my time.

and den.
wednesday wanna teach ervin stunts.
so anyone who wanna go happy with us pls contact me by any means.

well.
since this is a sian nite.
there will nt be much to write.
maybe next time write another post delicated to somebody else.
lol.

and so.
my hw left half only.
i thin the most hard one should be lit.
nid materials.
lol.
and somehow i think of learning pds.
and who in ZHNC can teach me?

friday.

these few days at home were either com or hw.
and playing TW.
currently warfare at the borders are tense, and i can get nobled anytime.
lolz.

and den.
nid to get my work done quickly.
so nxt time can go cycling with brandon and ervin.
den ytd.
had a conference chat on the fone.
me, joel, helmi, ervin, brandon.
quite stupid actually.
but did it out of boredom.
lolz.

life has been simple.
maybe i can do something to make it fun.

wednesday.

well.
schedule getting a bit tighter.
need to complete work.
and den sit acc on TW for kenny.
and also teaching ervin stunts.
lolz.
so nid to complete hw quickly.
den can play.
den my TW having war.
think very soon tio noble liao.
lolz.

currently.
as the time flies.
somehow.
i dun have much thoughts.
living a life as simple as water is the most boring thing on earth.
maybe i can organized more things.
lolz.

and so.
there's nt much bout today.
all the same boring things.
haiz.
life is simple yet boring.
i wan some revolution.

是早晨的太阳清新， 中午的骄阳红艳， 还是黄昏的落阳迷人？ 我要做中午那红艳骄阳，永远高高在上，艳丽四射。

tuesday.

and so.
the time went by.
i had been reading and playing and slacking all along.
well if anyone has CS 1.6 pls lend me.

and so.
today was another boring day.
without much activities.
and thinking when can i find time to go out again.
at home a bit lyk imprisonment.
lolz.

well.
maybe one day before sch reopens i can go cycling with brandon.
lol.

there's not much to say for today.
as the time went by.
i just hope that life can turn better.
in many many ways.
and hope i can hav more oppotunities to show potentials and so on.

as the day goes.
i really dread going back to e3.
to see those nonsensical ppl and listen to their f-up comment s again.
one lyk david.
go bakc must listen to him crap whole day.
and i think somehow my 1 yr life in zhonghua proves me who's worrthy to be my friend.
lol.

before i go off.
here something to ask u guys:

If the clock and turn back and time can return to the past, what are the very things that you all wanna do again, change again, or even done something you guys haven't done that time?

If the time can return to the past, I would like to do many mistakes again, maybe seek some help for my acne problems earlier, and even flirt those girls that I have seen yet not speaken to.

monday.

and so.
the day started.
witha bowl of porridge for breakfast.
and i prepare to meet ervin and leonar at mac.
and i went there.
to serangoon bus interchange.
and wait for ervin.

then.
both of us went around the area.
and then sit outside mac.
hell yeah.
there's this cute gal at the age of 11-12.
sitting by the window.
with her family.
den.
i look at her.
and she look back!
lolz.
and we kepp looking at each other.
she smiled!

den i get up to go into mac.
as i walk along.
her father stared me with a furious look.
lol.
and before she left.
she looked back at me?
lolz.

then.
leonard arrived.
and we had mac.
then went to net force games.
play cs.
play soldier front.

ltr on.
we went to kovan.
heartland mall.
walk around.
then go arcade.
got this two kids keep stalking us.
stupid stalkers!
i think they're out of tokens.

and so.
we went to old chang kee.
then went back to net force games for another hour.
b4 went bade gdbye.

today's a gd day.
well.
i look forward to tmr.
just hope it is not as boring.
as those other days.

sunday's evening

firstly.
gd evening folks.
well.
had been reading the last bit of outsiders and slacking then.

tmr's might not be so fun.
cuz only three ppl going.
den play cs have to fight bots.
lol.

well.
somehow.
i think i've change.
alot then.
but.
everything's screwed by the time i understand.
haiz.

well.
there's not much time left to sch reopens.
just hope i can have better teachers.
and the class can be better.
than can improve on academic results.
maybe try harder to make winston happy.
den go into PDS team.
better chance of promoting nxt yr.
then maybe they'll get me into FAC.
den i'll lose weights?
well it might be a gd thing if i go into FAC.
but not be be branded "fat".
lol.

well.
just hope maybe i can strike lottery.
or have a windfall.
so that i have some money.
then i can fly to munich.
and forget a bout studying.
lol.

笑看风云， 潇洒走过？

sunday.

today's sunday.
another weekend.
tmr is another play day.
but sadly joel chickened out at the last minute.
sad.

well.
ytd was my cousin's wedding.
lol.
make until lyk damn style.
den at the dinner.
saw JJ(that singer)'s father.
look quite lyk JJ.
well, they're father and son!

today.
i finally get down to my lit and english.
and maybe ltr going to do work.
and there's only like 25 days left to school's reopen.
i will have to chiong in the second week.
den third and last week can party everyday.
hahas.

well.
if some of u guys have seen on my tagboard.
there's a spammer named "me".
i deleted the spammer's tags and have already reported police.
i think...maybe get jailed or fine.
hahas.

maybe ltr will come up with a second post.
i dunno.

with that, i shall take flight now.

friday??

and so.
today's the same.
just that i went out for breakfast.
and den.
my bro's coming back from SISPEC today.
so next time i cant have any late night chats anymore.

and den.
i have not much time left to sch reopen.
i still have quite a number of work nt done.
quite easy stuff.
just that i nid some materials.
nid to buy. lol.

well.
since that night.
i dunno when i can ever have late night chats again.
well.
talking to a person in seven time zones away.
isnt that great?
lol.

and den.
tmr is my cousin's wedding.
lol.
so tmr cant slack at home liao.
den monday is mcdonald operation CS.
part B only leonard coming.
maybe can get soif or other ppl.
lol.

haiz.
somehow.
its been three years.
time flies.
but yet.
why the hell im still thinking of her? lol.
i just hope that when i retun to sch.
at least those kids wun be so cold to me.
or else ZHSS life is dull except for those NCc trainings.
lol.

well.
gonna sign off.
my greatest aim or target now.
is to lose some weights and get my acne cure.
at least next time i got face to see her.
lol.

thursday.

well.
today's raining in the afternoon.
all sorts of same old routine today, as ytd.
just that there's visitors to my house-- zhiquan, costner and their friends.

somehow.
i began to look forward to night.
where my life is more livelier.
and i look forward to mondays on december.
when i can go out with ervin and sort of.

life is still as dull.
i wonder who will be there to brighten my life up.
maybe i just took the wrong step.
ever since the beginning.

but.
i have never regret.
i just hope i can make something out of this steps.
something that im proud of.

and those ZHNC ppl who wans to play lan pls call me.

minutes to midnite.

well.
this post is delicated to someone.
so i try to use proper english as much as i can.

Minutes to Midnight.

The time now flashing on my desktop's screen is 1138. I still have another 22 minutes to midnight. As the time passed by minutes by minutes, I began to look back at the conversation about half an hour ago.

It was a conversation between me and her. Time passed by so fast, three yeasr has gone. She grew up to be young and beautiful, tall and slender. And me, from a dashing young lad to a toad.

Me both met in the school. The first time I saw her was the time when I was still in Art Club, and she was in Art Club too. But the both of us don't really interact a lot then, and we're just like strangers. At that moment, I was a young P4 kid.

One year passed by, and I was promoted to the best academic class for all subjects. I got into higher mother tongue, so does she. Anyway, she's a chinese german, so we expect her chinese to have a standard. At that time, the teacher was an old man on part time, and so those classmates were using the CL lessons for interaction. And the first interaction between me and her began on the first chinese lesson.

She sat at the seat in front of me, and around us was a girl named Hazel and a guy called Jonathan. Since the first day of CL lessons, I began to take notice of this little pretty thing sitting in front of me. But then, at that time, I don't have any means to flirt her or sort of. Feeling bored during chinese lessons, I always play pranks on her. Sort of. And she will so called "quarrel" with me everytime then, and stick her tongue out at me sometimes.

And so. Those good old days went by, and everyday we're talking to each other, treating the CL teacher as a transparent sheet. Soon, I was somehow getting more and more interested with her, and soon, I took a liking or a fancy to her. And that very feeling begins on one time when she, again stick her tongue out at me.

And soon, we're not so bad to each other anymore, we treateach other like real friends. And everytime I looked at her, I always thought that she has something to tell me. Maybe I was thinking too much. And those days during the P5 days were the most carefree of all. And soon, I find those Chinese lessons the best part of daily life then.

However, the sweetness of my first one sided romance did not last long. It was after a few moths that she told us she had to return to Germany, all because her dad was posted there for work. WTF!? And the last day I saw her in Singapore, was the day I wanted to tell her then, "I fancy you." She gave me an eraser, a pen and a higlighter before she go, as an souvineur. The eraser was gone, as my bro used it for drawing( you poor bloke CSM! ), the pen's out of ink, the the highlighter i kept intact. Well, the next day, her seat was empty.

Ever since she left, my lifestyle did not change much, just that I lost a companion that I can talk to on CL lessons. I began to have pimples, soon acne, then i grew a bit fat, and not long later, I went for the school's first immersion to Shanghai and got the best outstanding cadet award then.

And so, she left me an email address before she left, and her address in Germany. Wonder did that address change, but the email did not change.

And today, we're having another chat again, from Germany to Singapore, a time zone difference of 7 hours. Yes, she gew up to be beautiful and slender, but what about me?

She mention just now that she find me very handsome then. Well, it suppose to be a truth, but its history compared to now? When she said she wanted my photo, i did not show her, n case that she's being shocked by my disfigured looks. And my bad figure. Well, seriously, I use to have abs last time.

Another night spend talking to her, I rejected all SMSs and chats. Just to talk to her. One thing that happened between us after she left for Germany, is that we confessed to the opposites that we once fancy each other. But it was already too late; she's in Germany.

Three years went by, she had two ex-boyfriends, for me, those girls hate me to the core. But one thing to tell you readers, she's the only girl I have ever fancy, and even now, I still think of her sometimes. Maybe I can't forget her. I tired to forget her by doing lots of shit and crap, but that cost me a lot, even my promotion.

I must say, when she said she had two boyfriend then, it did hurt me a bit. But to her, I think it foesn't matter anymore. For I'm history to her, or sort of.

I await for the day that I can see her again. When I earned enough money, maybe I'll fly over to Germany to find her. And when I see her, I just want to tell her, "I miss you a lot. Where'd you been?"

As i can remeber how david always criticize women from China, sometimes I just want to tell him, "Not all girls from China are so bad." But to keep my "ah beng" image, which I seriously doesn't want it, I have to shut my trap sometimes.

And so, I wonder she'll read this post or not, or even notice it. Oh, it passed midnight, it's now Thursday. I just hope hours later I can talk to her again, for a very simple reason, "You're always on my heart."

And those shit crap with qiaohan has always been a shit crap. I think somehow I couldn't forget her for life.

Well, if she has seen this post, I hope that she'll know that I'm still here for her. And I'm sorry for the fact that you can't see my picture, because I'm having severe acne problems. And I'll promised you, if you did come down to Singapore on next year's July or August, you will see me as the handsome lad you have thought of always. By then, you might have another boyfriend, but I'll always be here, forever.

This post is written for you. Take care and stay pretty.

By Yitian,
For Emy.
Started 1138hrs on Wed, 3/12, Ended here at 0010hrs on Thurs, 4/12

nite falls.

and so.
as the nite fell.
the high spirits i have in the morning goes down.
life's getting more and more bored,
and there's nth for me.

life seems to be no motivation for me.
currently i dunno wad i am living for.
except for the fact that i wan to go to senior spec course.

and so.
while i read through other ppl blog.
somehow i find big differences between me and them.
they're in the sweetness of courtship and the joy of merrymaking.
while my life is dull and dark.

ever since i was demoralized at annual camp.
i dunno wad should i do eveytime i wake up.
it just about hw, com, and lan or movies on monday mornings.
somehow i wonder wad has always beens in for me in life.
but i dun see any results.
maybe i was born and bred differenlt from the other ppl.
well.
i suppose life to be lyk this:
born, study, army, job, retirement, sickness, death.
is my life going to be so dull?

and den.
when other ask u,
"wad talents u have" or sth lyk that.
i cant answer any.
well my only "talent" is to "kheng", or malinger.

and so.
a 13 yr old youngster.
yet my life is so different from the others.
and its screwed badly.
i dunno wad's wrong wif me.

maybe it was too late to repent.
or too close to the ending.
but wad i wish.
is just three things.
NCC, academic results, and...merrymaking?

wednesday?

and so.
a new day begins.
fresh air and chirping of birds.

days have gone.
and i getting more sturdy everyday.
well.
im currently planning with ervin the next mcdonalds' outing.
maybe nxt time we two can plan the RTc, or annual camp?
lolz.

and so.
currently getting ppl for lan on monday.
som if u're interested.
pls contact me.

anw.
life is simple yet boring.
just needs some stuff that's better.
hahas.

i look forward to tmr.

sianz.

well.
life is really quite sianz today.
cant really start work until my outsiders returns tmr.
and ervin's hse bunny cock up in my com.
so life is so dull.

anw.
i wonder is life the same as today tmr.
sian sian sian.
haiz.
i wonder when surprises are in for me.
lolz.

tuesday?

okays.
and so.
i still rmb something that three of the sixsomes done ytd.
which is...a rare scene?

and so.
ytd while walking to amk hub.
ervin, kah chee and me was fooling around.
den.
we came across on old lady.
pushing a heavy trolley full of things.
well.
somehow at first we walked a few steps away from her.
but then.
we quickly turned back helped her.
but the old lady rejected us:
"i can do it myself. thx young man."
"welcome" said ervin.

well.
another incident was this:
we went to sebawang music.
and trash on of the shlefs there.
nevertheless.
we nvr walked away.
we picked up the shelf.
and arrange the CDs back on the shelfs according to their genre.
and ltr on apologizing to the shop owner.

somehow.
i thought around.
in singapore.
there might be a few ppl who would do the second incident.
but wad about the first?
amk was so crowded.
yet no one lend a helping hand to the old lady.
is singaporeans really so mean?

and den.
beside me, ervin and kah chee.
who in NCC would put down enjoyment first to help the old lady?
kenneth?
chong kai?
brandon?

well.
somehow.
the old lady might not even realized that we are frequent visitors to lan shops.
lolz.

and so.
just wanna tell my readers.
nxt time on the streets.
u see an old lady, a bagala.
or even some other ppl.
having trouble pushing or carrying some heavy stuff.
lend a helping hand to them.
i believe this will brighten their day in the forsaken singapore.

monday? part 2.

and so.
today was a nice day.
i went out of hm at 10.
and took a bus to zhss.
and wait for kah chee and ervin outside zhss.
after that.
we went to mac for lunch.

and so.
we leave for j8.
whr we catch a movie called "four christmas" there.
quite a nice show, actually.
and saw soif and you liang there.
and den.
we went around j8.
and ltr went to amk hub.
saw sum zhss ppl.
and after some loitering.
we decide to play lan.

and so.
we reach serangoon bus interchange.
and den.
saw the CO ppl.
qhan suan me for nt getting rank.
lol.
nxt time she watch out.
den played wif gee tat for a while.
and went to net force games.

over there.
played cs.
take turns to own.
and take turns to tio own.
lol.
den went hm after that.

today was a nice day.
but sadly kenny chang gave empty promises of cming.
"nxt time cant cm, just tell me, no nid to disappear, kays?"
and so.
nxt monday gonna have "mcdonalds' outing" again.
hope more ppl can cm.
maybe can get part b.

~comments~

somehow.
i find that the best thing ncc gave me.
should be my platoon mates.
especially the sixsome.
well.
those ppl i should really call "brothers" should be the sixsome.
especially ervin.
we're getting better in friendships.
and kah chee.
another gd fren.

somehow.
i decided sth.
"those mates are far more better than posts and ranks."
well.
i should cherish them more.
more than i cherish oppotunities to get promote.

its the affinity that gets us together.
when i have so much "cursed affinity" this yr.
maybe the sixsome are the ones standing by me.
or am i standing by myself?

and so.
i called the other five of the sixsome "brothers".
(the last some is me)
and when i call them brother.
i will do the utmost to help them in times of trouble.
for the sworn in between.

"from strangers, we came together as platoon mates, then friends, then brothers. may i ask, what has brought us together? nothing but affinity."

monday?

and so.
today's monday.
as u guys saw it.
i deleted all my post.
maybe i guessed that person who scolded me.
well.
just to say mr (8) [ms?].
if u wanna scold me.
just cm in front of me.
and i nvr blame anyone for nt promoting.
i am just ai wan for nt being given bak as much as i given.

well.
if u wann scold me again.
u can email me.
and nxt time.
be a man and face me, okay?
um spoil me mood today.