well, its another day...of suprise.
everything went on with the kinda good mood.
and then the 1 hr geog wasnt so tiring today.
aiya, wad else u wan do after geog exam?
and then mrs kok went around the classrm trying to rmb all our name.
and there's xiao man. a very nice name.
and then during phy mr tang lost his voice.
oh dear, he better not take mc tmr.
cant afford to fail phy..zzz.
and everything was going on so normal.
until the last minutes before the bell goes,
mr ivan(the sch counsellor) came to look for me.
okay, dun think wrong,
im not a problematic kid or wad,
but im facing human rights problems with the impel down peeps.
so, had a chat for abt 1 hr,
and found out that he came to me due to a tcher's request.
and told him to tell the tcher abt everything in the convo.
after all, its better this way; tcher will understand the situation better.
one of mr ivan's quote was on good terms with me.
forget how it goes lyk,
but it says that we go through problems to become stronger,
and life's somehow a challenge.
well, i've thought of it;
destiny made me to go through two tiring yrs,
to prepare myself to create a destiny for this world.
through all these days in impel down,
all these incidents, stereotypes, biased thoughts...
refine me into a person of exception high EQ,
and strong in all ways.
perhaps, all these are a stage that i've to go through,
in order to have a better tmr.
well, discuss abt one problem with mr ivan.
talk abt how i wanted recognition from the class.
well, they are hard sure that i'll fail in my life.
but then...
i'll make myself...KING.
perhaps, life's greatest regret,
and life greatest lesson,
is getting into impel down for all this shyt;
life's prolouge to succession,
resides in all of 2e3.
i dun care whether they've seen that i have change,
i dun care how they view me;
all i noe is,
for those who supported me and trusted me,
i wun let them down;
for those who despise me and have biased looks on me,
i'll prove them wrong.
Let's not talk about the hardships and obstacles in this road, let's not talk about the failure or success of this journey. All I know is that, I'm gonna do it, and destiny stalls a page for it to be complete.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
tuesday.
Walk on.
well, today, indeed, is another fruitful day.
things seems pretty bad at first.
but slowly, you'll find the meaning behind it.
okay, again we had rugby for pe today.
team up with dav, jx and martin.
nice combo. the teamwork is quite nice.
however, there's a kind of unhappiness to it.
well, the spectators were waiting for david to score.
but then, i was the one who ran straight and scored the goal.
somehow, again, i felt the honour lyk wad i felt duing 2.4 again.
the kind of achievement, the kind of happy.
to many, perhaps scoring a goal in rugby isnt nothing pretty much.
but sport games aint my forte;
somemore, i manage to kind of suprise some ppl by scoring a goal.
cuz they didnt expect me to do it, and they maybe did not wan me to do it.
well, ltr some kind of perception towards some things,
and some incidents cause me to be in a low mood. not bad mood.
then, ltr during lit, an irony occured,
as we're doing an unseen prose abt an outcast and some sort of things lyk this.
this, immediately, led me to think of myself.
'aint i being outcasted by much of the class?'
and then during the last ten mins of lit,
i went on telling mdm ng abt how life screwed me badly,
inner and outer; physical, emotional, metal.
then mdm ng went on to explain abt some hadicap guy who ran a marathon,
and her own life story.
somehow, i began to think,
why has such things been proven as a problems to me?
being stereotyped, being outcasted, being despise...
the cue towards thinking is,
these are not problems that ordinary ppl can handle.
all these months in impel down lvl 6...
well, facing all the same boos and stereotypes,
and then receiving comments of 'tyco' or 'sheer luck' when u tried ur best to score goals.
no one shared your joy, no one shared your woes.
through these months, i've walked alone,
enduring all of it, hoping for a miracle to happen, as i created it myself.
but nothing seem to change.
still outcasted, still stereotyped, still despised.
On our journey across the islands, all of us became stronger without even noticing.
-Part of Zoro's speech to Nami and Chopper.
somehow, today's chain of incidents relate me to this quote.
through all these months, i've become stronger day by day,
without realising it. only when i turn bk then i realise.
i've grown to be mentally, emotionally, physically strong.
now, wad i lack is the outer appearance to give good first impression.
so, i'll start vigourous trng,
of 200 sit ups, 120 wide arm push ups, and 7 pull ups per day.
if i have time i would run 3.6km per day also.
ooh, btw, i suddenly thought of something quite funny.
for anime fans out there, you all might noe who is Rob Lucci from One Piece.
yea, qhan reminds me of lucci.
you all can search lucci up in google, so u'll noe wad i mean.
well, anw, i think i shall make a personal committment,
of defeating all obstacles, growing stronger and stronger day by day;
and to quickly complete stage 3 of the Operation.
this includes:
- 54-55kg,
- chest muscles,
- six pack abs,
- facelift and a new face and hairstyle.
well, i nid to complete all this b4 the start of next yr.
Its not a fight between me and others; its one between myself. Its all about throwing away all the stereotypes and detest. Its all personal effort.
well, today, indeed, is another fruitful day.
things seems pretty bad at first.
but slowly, you'll find the meaning behind it.
okay, again we had rugby for pe today.
team up with dav, jx and martin.
nice combo. the teamwork is quite nice.
however, there's a kind of unhappiness to it.
well, the spectators were waiting for david to score.
but then, i was the one who ran straight and scored the goal.
somehow, again, i felt the honour lyk wad i felt duing 2.4 again.
the kind of achievement, the kind of happy.
to many, perhaps scoring a goal in rugby isnt nothing pretty much.
but sport games aint my forte;
somemore, i manage to kind of suprise some ppl by scoring a goal.
cuz they didnt expect me to do it, and they maybe did not wan me to do it.
well, ltr some kind of perception towards some things,
and some incidents cause me to be in a low mood. not bad mood.
then, ltr during lit, an irony occured,
as we're doing an unseen prose abt an outcast and some sort of things lyk this.
this, immediately, led me to think of myself.
'aint i being outcasted by much of the class?'
and then during the last ten mins of lit,
i went on telling mdm ng abt how life screwed me badly,
inner and outer; physical, emotional, metal.
then mdm ng went on to explain abt some hadicap guy who ran a marathon,
and her own life story.
somehow, i began to think,
why has such things been proven as a problems to me?
being stereotyped, being outcasted, being despise...
the cue towards thinking is,
these are not problems that ordinary ppl can handle.
all these months in impel down lvl 6...
well, facing all the same boos and stereotypes,
and then receiving comments of 'tyco' or 'sheer luck' when u tried ur best to score goals.
no one shared your joy, no one shared your woes.
through these months, i've walked alone,
enduring all of it, hoping for a miracle to happen, as i created it myself.
but nothing seem to change.
still outcasted, still stereotyped, still despised.
On our journey across the islands, all of us became stronger without even noticing.
-Part of Zoro's speech to Nami and Chopper.
somehow, today's chain of incidents relate me to this quote.
through all these months, i've become stronger day by day,
without realising it. only when i turn bk then i realise.
i've grown to be mentally, emotionally, physically strong.
now, wad i lack is the outer appearance to give good first impression.
so, i'll start vigourous trng,
of 200 sit ups, 120 wide arm push ups, and 7 pull ups per day.
if i have time i would run 3.6km per day also.
ooh, btw, i suddenly thought of something quite funny.
for anime fans out there, you all might noe who is Rob Lucci from One Piece.
yea, qhan reminds me of lucci.
you all can search lucci up in google, so u'll noe wad i mean.
well, anw, i think i shall make a personal committment,
of defeating all obstacles, growing stronger and stronger day by day;
and to quickly complete stage 3 of the Operation.
this includes:
- 54-55kg,
- chest muscles,
- six pack abs,
- facelift and a new face and hairstyle.
well, i nid to complete all this b4 the start of next yr.
Its not a fight between me and others; its one between myself. Its all about throwing away all the stereotypes and detest. Its all personal effort.
Monday, October 5, 2009
monday.
wow, i still got time to blog. *claps*
today is another peaceful yet fun day.
well, its the usual stuff you get every monday,
and things were, thankfully, nice today.
the highlight for the day is home econs lesson.
well, we're suppose to make some kind of rice pancake,
but i turn out to be preparing fried rice.
the quality of the rice sucks,
and then using cooked rice straight away isnt too good.
ce was another talk cock session.
instead of spending time revising,
we spent time talking nonsensical stuff away.
had been thinking of something,
over and over again.
well, not abt the self,
and yet not abt any stereotyping.
its more abt myself.
'why do i have to still be lyk that despite i dun wan to be anymore?'
once you gets into a role too deep,
sometimes you might just lose urself.
RAR read my taodeching today.
he said that it has some kind of 'holy feeling',
or even 'hirameki'.
try reading the book;
it can answer to all ur qn.
having tuition today.
well, the last few sessions liao.
will surely miss them the next yr.
perhaps should really chiong all the studies this week.
things are getting more and more serious.
Ever wonder why has the sea allows all rivers to flow into it? This is due to the reason that it resides in a lower region than the rivers, allowing the rivers to flow into it. Human should learn from the sea; to put other's interest before one's, to be humble and respectful to everyone.
today is another peaceful yet fun day.
well, its the usual stuff you get every monday,
and things were, thankfully, nice today.
the highlight for the day is home econs lesson.
well, we're suppose to make some kind of rice pancake,
but i turn out to be preparing fried rice.
the quality of the rice sucks,
and then using cooked rice straight away isnt too good.
ce was another talk cock session.
instead of spending time revising,
we spent time talking nonsensical stuff away.
had been thinking of something,
over and over again.
well, not abt the self,
and yet not abt any stereotyping.
its more abt myself.
'why do i have to still be lyk that despite i dun wan to be anymore?'
once you gets into a role too deep,
sometimes you might just lose urself.
RAR read my taodeching today.
he said that it has some kind of 'holy feeling',
or even 'hirameki'.
try reading the book;
it can answer to all ur qn.
having tuition today.
well, the last few sessions liao.
will surely miss them the next yr.
perhaps should really chiong all the studies this week.
things are getting more and more serious.
Ever wonder why has the sea allows all rivers to flow into it? This is due to the reason that it resides in a lower region than the rivers, allowing the rivers to flow into it. Human should learn from the sea; to put other's interest before one's, to be humble and respectful to everyone.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
sunday.
Dai Enkai: Entei!
one of Portgas D. Ace best attacks,
or perhaps is his strongest attack ever seen.
okay, sunday is yet another slack day,
but a prolouge to all monday blues.
tmr, i guess the tchers will start to chiong us with last revisions,
and then slowly kill us b4 the main papers arrives.
just slack the whole morning with the com,
and the just visited the class blog.
its the exam period, and hardly anyone blogs;
much less for the class blog that has been pretty dead always.
and finally today i saw post by joanne and huiwen.
well, some colors for the dull blog.
and was thinking over the class.
'is the two yrs of fate ending lyk this?'
seriously, all along the class has been a disappointment.
okay, lets not take the stereotype case and tuesday incident into it;
but for the others, the class have been such disappointment.
not being able to work with one another is not much a trouble,
but not able to understand and accept one another,
and then just all the misunderstands and hatred...
this play is a tragedy,
and unfortunately, i play the tragic hero.
perhaps its the worst of human nature i ever seen in 2e3,
and yet the best of human nature.
the selfishness, the prejudice, the detest;
and yet enternal brotherhood, selflessness, understanding.
among i met ppl i respected with valour and honour;
and yet i met ppl i despise on their ill personality.
all soon, as wad i keep saying in the previous post,
everything's gonna end. the show's gonna end.
ending with immature ppl, prejudice, and even more hatred.
sometimes, why just can u guys sit down and talk all out nicely?
i saw all of the worst of society in 2e3.
but, this was wad makes me an even more enlightened person.
i rmb once i had a convo with one of my classmates abt the class.
well, the only feeling she has is sadness.
on one hand, i saw the bad pts of human nature that bounds me tightly;
yet on another, i saw the best virtues and morals that release me again.
I used to be like you, thinking that I'm correct and others are wrong. You have some potential. But don't let this kind of ill personality destroys your only little potential left.
some ppl thought im the worst of all, bound to fail.
some ppl yet view me as a rising phoenix, the successor of this world.
but i view myself, as one unique and extraordinary person.
Things varies in many ways, on how you decipher and sees it. But for once, the qualities of a leader never change, and this truth can never be deny.
one of Portgas D. Ace best attacks,
or perhaps is his strongest attack ever seen.
okay, sunday is yet another slack day,
but a prolouge to all monday blues.
tmr, i guess the tchers will start to chiong us with last revisions,
and then slowly kill us b4 the main papers arrives.
just slack the whole morning with the com,
and the just visited the class blog.
its the exam period, and hardly anyone blogs;
much less for the class blog that has been pretty dead always.
and finally today i saw post by joanne and huiwen.
well, some colors for the dull blog.
and was thinking over the class.
'is the two yrs of fate ending lyk this?'
seriously, all along the class has been a disappointment.
okay, lets not take the stereotype case and tuesday incident into it;
but for the others, the class have been such disappointment.
not being able to work with one another is not much a trouble,
but not able to understand and accept one another,
and then just all the misunderstands and hatred...
this play is a tragedy,
and unfortunately, i play the tragic hero.
perhaps its the worst of human nature i ever seen in 2e3,
and yet the best of human nature.
the selfishness, the prejudice, the detest;
and yet enternal brotherhood, selflessness, understanding.
among i met ppl i respected with valour and honour;
and yet i met ppl i despise on their ill personality.
all soon, as wad i keep saying in the previous post,
everything's gonna end. the show's gonna end.
ending with immature ppl, prejudice, and even more hatred.
sometimes, why just can u guys sit down and talk all out nicely?
i saw all of the worst of society in 2e3.
but, this was wad makes me an even more enlightened person.
i rmb once i had a convo with one of my classmates abt the class.
well, the only feeling she has is sadness.
on one hand, i saw the bad pts of human nature that bounds me tightly;
yet on another, i saw the best virtues and morals that release me again.
I used to be like you, thinking that I'm correct and others are wrong. You have some potential. But don't let this kind of ill personality destroys your only little potential left.
some ppl thought im the worst of all, bound to fail.
some ppl yet view me as a rising phoenix, the successor of this world.
but i view myself, as one unique and extraordinary person.
Things varies in many ways, on how you decipher and sees it. But for once, the qualities of a leader never change, and this truth can never be deny.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
saturday.
Never to judge a book by its cover.
Just thinking abt judging ppl by the appearance.
how much would we stereotype, how much would we misunderstand.
sometimes, judging ppl by the appearance,
will make you lose things or even chances that coundn't come bk anymore.
judge ppl by their appearance,
you'll find out that you cant discover one's good pts;
on the other hand, you cant discover an evil person's true mindset.
bad stuff always comes in good packaging in the market,
to attract buyers.
good stuff always are hidden in rags and cloths,
to hide its real worth.
long ago, i've realise, it wad that is in the inner is important;
till now, have how many realise that?
beauty is an illusion,
but only the inner self is the truth.
the appearance of a human body won't last long;
but their spirits live forever.
~
okay, enough of lecturing.
have been thinking of this thing the past night.
i wonder how many ppl have miss certain thing sjust by judging by the cover.
A shallow person, no matter how charming, is still a shallow person.
attaining such thinkings through only self-thinking process,
i guess that my brain is a god's gift.
saturday.
maybe i'll start revision on my humanities or sciences,
and if the weather is gd i'll go for a jog.
time is flying away bit by bit...
hmm. for now i only wonder wad the future has for me.
well, today's mid autumn.
only till now this festival has not much meaning for me anymore.
last time its enjoyable due to laterns, fire and mooncakes.
but now, its just another simple day; with a reason behind.
moon shines brightly than ever on this day.
a family will then sit down and gaze at the moon,
admiring its beauty over a cup of tea.
but have you ever thought of, wad makes it shine so brightly?
the sun.
the sun rules the day, the moon rules the night.
even if the sun cant be seen at night,
its rays are still with us: the moonlight.
the moon reflects off light from the sun,
and then glows to its highest on full moon nights.
one would actually praise and admire the moon on full moon nights,
but who have ever thought of,
who is the contributor to prevail the beauty of the moon?
the sun.
wad im trying to portray here,
is the eternal existence of brightness and truth, and justice.
using the sun as an example.
even if darkness and deception are to take place after some time,
justice and truth still prevails, through the very main object of darkness!
who has ever thought of all this?
only then, during thr darkness period,
one would only praise and admire the efforts of the main object of darkness?
but who has thought of, it was the existence of brightness that led to the shining of darkness?
and yet brightness has no grudge or complain.
it just simply let darkness borrow its rays,
and shine to the utmost. why?
because darkness will eventually fade and brightness will prevail,
just like how a new day starts everyday.
The comparison, the complains and compliment of an object, is due to the fact that another object exist at the same time.
Just thinking abt judging ppl by the appearance.
how much would we stereotype, how much would we misunderstand.
sometimes, judging ppl by the appearance,
will make you lose things or even chances that coundn't come bk anymore.
judge ppl by their appearance,
you'll find out that you cant discover one's good pts;
on the other hand, you cant discover an evil person's true mindset.
bad stuff always comes in good packaging in the market,
to attract buyers.
good stuff always are hidden in rags and cloths,
to hide its real worth.
long ago, i've realise, it wad that is in the inner is important;
till now, have how many realise that?
beauty is an illusion,
but only the inner self is the truth.
the appearance of a human body won't last long;
but their spirits live forever.
~
okay, enough of lecturing.
have been thinking of this thing the past night.
i wonder how many ppl have miss certain thing sjust by judging by the cover.
A shallow person, no matter how charming, is still a shallow person.
attaining such thinkings through only self-thinking process,
i guess that my brain is a god's gift.
saturday.
maybe i'll start revision on my humanities or sciences,
and if the weather is gd i'll go for a jog.
time is flying away bit by bit...
hmm. for now i only wonder wad the future has for me.
well, today's mid autumn.
only till now this festival has not much meaning for me anymore.
last time its enjoyable due to laterns, fire and mooncakes.
but now, its just another simple day; with a reason behind.
moon shines brightly than ever on this day.
a family will then sit down and gaze at the moon,
admiring its beauty over a cup of tea.
but have you ever thought of, wad makes it shine so brightly?
the sun.
the sun rules the day, the moon rules the night.
even if the sun cant be seen at night,
its rays are still with us: the moonlight.
the moon reflects off light from the sun,
and then glows to its highest on full moon nights.
one would actually praise and admire the moon on full moon nights,
but who have ever thought of,
who is the contributor to prevail the beauty of the moon?
the sun.
wad im trying to portray here,
is the eternal existence of brightness and truth, and justice.
using the sun as an example.
even if darkness and deception are to take place after some time,
justice and truth still prevails, through the very main object of darkness!
who has ever thought of all this?
only then, during thr darkness period,
one would only praise and admire the efforts of the main object of darkness?
but who has thought of, it was the existence of brightness that led to the shining of darkness?
and yet brightness has no grudge or complain.
it just simply let darkness borrow its rays,
and shine to the utmost. why?
because darkness will eventually fade and brightness will prevail,
just like how a new day starts everyday.
The comparison, the complains and compliment of an object, is due to the fact that another object exist at the same time.
Friday, October 2, 2009
friday.
There's no way something can be absolute, or something can be eternal. Everything were born of nothing, and nothing shall always be the start and end of everything. Things matter in a way not totally how you feel and view them, but how are you going to decipher the true meaning behind it. All feelings are just the temptations of the mundane world, all knowledge are the dust of this earth. To gain knowledge and strength, one has to guarantee an increase everyday. To gain inner cultivation, one has to guarantee negative gaining everyday, till one has nothing left and return to the stage of the very beginning. True enlightenment is not to see through, but to go through all temptations and feelings from the starting point of nothingness, then return to the point after seeing all temptations, able to withstand them and gain cultivation as one go through.
i gained something lyk this enlightenment while reading a taosit scripture.
TaoDeChing, a book of merely less than 80 chpts,
but contain the answer and question to all of this world.
well, suddenly a thought strike me when i'm reading a particular chpt.
that's enlightenment, from all illusions.
suddenly i feel that i can give up everything now.
suddenly i feel the preciousness of life.
suddenly i feel how the value of life stands over the value of the mundane world.
~
today has been a nice day, really.
dunno wad force has been helping me,
i dun feel the nervous for this papers,
and yet dun feel the ego as well.
somehow, i manage to finish both papers with a normal mood,
without too much confidence, and without too much despair.
this is the very first time that it really felt so normal.
not a breeze. not a challenge. it was lyk any normal assignment.
and now the weekends arrives.
well, have to go jogging to burn the excessive calories i gain this wk.
look, im health conscious; without health there isnt much things u can do.
~
i suddenly feel a release from all the feelings.
all the love, all the anger, all the hatred.
i dunno whether i have seen through them,
but for once i noe,
i've gone through, been through, and now,
i have thought through.
i thought of a 5 Gs to follow in my life:
- Good Adventure
- Good Food
- Good Physical Exercise
- Good Books
- Good Job
taste life; in a way that everything seem so non existing. then you'll find the best of life.
i gained something lyk this enlightenment while reading a taosit scripture.
TaoDeChing, a book of merely less than 80 chpts,
but contain the answer and question to all of this world.
well, suddenly a thought strike me when i'm reading a particular chpt.
that's enlightenment, from all illusions.
suddenly i feel that i can give up everything now.
suddenly i feel the preciousness of life.
suddenly i feel how the value of life stands over the value of the mundane world.
~
today has been a nice day, really.
dunno wad force has been helping me,
i dun feel the nervous for this papers,
and yet dun feel the ego as well.
somehow, i manage to finish both papers with a normal mood,
without too much confidence, and without too much despair.
this is the very first time that it really felt so normal.
not a breeze. not a challenge. it was lyk any normal assignment.
and now the weekends arrives.
well, have to go jogging to burn the excessive calories i gain this wk.
look, im health conscious; without health there isnt much things u can do.
~
i suddenly feel a release from all the feelings.
all the love, all the anger, all the hatred.
i dunno whether i have seen through them,
but for once i noe,
i've gone through, been through, and now,
i have thought through.
i thought of a 5 Gs to follow in my life:
- Good Adventure
- Good Food
- Good Physical Exercise
- Good Books
- Good Job
taste life; in a way that everything seem so non existing. then you'll find the best of life.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
thursday.
The 250th post.
well, im still postiung during exam period;
tons of spare time to relax before hardcore mugging ltr.
the papers today were half-screwed,
but i manage to grit my teeth and go through them.
counting and counting,
there aint much time left to the end cof eoy;
its just a fortnight away.
so this means that the end of sch will be around one mth away,
then i have to say bye bye to 2e3'09 and start preparing for ncc.
these days gonna be real bored,
and sometimes might skip using com.
but then, i'll try to strike a balance in life,
and not overwork myself.
i seriously lack a lot of energy nowadays;
feel very tired and doesnt want to continue with all this.
but no choice. its eoy and then last moments with 2e3'09.
dun really wish for much;
just wanna get into pure hist and complete one stage for the Operation.
i guess i'll have to really perk myself up,
and complete this last stand.
good game, tmr is geog + el paper 2.
start chionging barhs~
well, im still postiung during exam period;
tons of spare time to relax before hardcore mugging ltr.
the papers today were half-screwed,
but i manage to grit my teeth and go through them.
counting and counting,
there aint much time left to the end cof eoy;
its just a fortnight away.
so this means that the end of sch will be around one mth away,
then i have to say bye bye to 2e3'09 and start preparing for ncc.
these days gonna be real bored,
and sometimes might skip using com.
but then, i'll try to strike a balance in life,
and not overwork myself.
i seriously lack a lot of energy nowadays;
feel very tired and doesnt want to continue with all this.
but no choice. its eoy and then last moments with 2e3'09.
dun really wish for much;
just wanna get into pure hist and complete one stage for the Operation.
i guess i'll have to really perk myself up,
and complete this last stand.
good game, tmr is geog + el paper 2.
start chionging barhs~
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