Rainbow after the rain.

you'll see a rainbow after rain.
well, the same kind of theories always apply everywhere.
after every obstacle of problem, you'll gain something.
but not everything that you gain is a rainbow.

i've seen various miracles in my life.
especially this year.
there are things that brought back the brilliant smile on my face.
seeing a miracle in freestyle drill,
reconciling with various platoon mates.
but not every miracle give me the same kind of feeling.
sometimes, certain miracles happen.
they happen to tell me to resign to fate.

a rainbow is cause by refraction of white light when they shine through water vapour.
somewhat or rather, we can call them an illusion.
you can see them, but they are never there for you.
i've seen various rainbow in my life,
after the obstacles in my life.
but these colourful bridges are built not for me.
they are built for those beside me,
to bring them somewhere higher than where i am.

i remember playing a fear factor game yesterday.
i ran across the road with two cars coming from two directions,
over a loop, which means they cannot see me.
but alas, i never die.
i thought something dramatic like i'll get knock over and my body splits up.
Mr Yang Bing thought i was crossing the road to hail for a cab ._.

really, i got tired of of these injustices and unfairness.

doing things hard, do things smart.
but certain times, the results ain't there hard and smart.
just like how the rain that showered over me,
produce rainbow for others.

i just made a vow to continue fighting yesterday.
but just one day later, i got very, very tired.

i always wonder who would stand by my side and fight with me during hard times.
i would say, none.
but somewhat or rather i'm glad that at least there are people who are willing to help me in times if emergency.
well thanks a lot, you know who you are,
if not i couldn't get my work done by today.

i always thought of being someone great.
great in a way that i contribute a lot to my passions,
and benefit the community.
in such, for the past two years,
i slogged my heads off in various areas,
hoping to be rewarded for my hard work.

but who wonders that someone who keeps the profile low,
and contributes somewhat little compared to me gets more than me.
i don't blame that person.
but i blame how things worked.
if i couldn't get an answer from reprimanding myself,
i wonder where else i could get an answer.

i have to continue with it.
it doesn't matter if people are going to laugh at me,
like how they did it last time, like how they did it now.
i always feel that its noble to give your life for a noble cause.
in which, this noble cause i believe in.

i have to tell them.
bow, or i make you do a reverse bow.

so what if i can understand things faster? so what if i get enlightened easily? looks, skills, figures, brains...i need to have what ordinary people have.